Showing posts with label inspiration. Show all posts
Showing posts with label inspiration. Show all posts

Fellowship Friday: Current Inspiration

Happy Friday! 
 This week, I wanted to share with you what is inspiring me right now. These people, books and sites are what's encouraging me to pursue my days with a more loving heart and to dive deeper in the Word. This is who (and what) is help filling my cup lately :)

Devotion: 
I love all things Shauna Niequest. Have I mentioned that before? ;-) She came out with a daily devotion earlier this year. If you're wanting to get into daily devotions-start here. I'll be the first to admit, after having kids, my time alone time with God was often put to the back burner. I'm not a morning person to begin with-so if I couldn't squeeze it in at night, it didn't happen. Then comes Shauna. She has helped me get back into the habit of starting my mornings with Jesus. They are one pagers...pray, read, pray. I've caught the morning devotion bug thanks to Savor. 


Music:
Oh, Crowder, you've pleased my little worshipping soul for some time now. Our life group, went to the Air1 Positive Hits Tour last night. His style of song and worship does not disappoint. But my up and coming new favorite is Lauren Daigle...who was also on the tour. Her ballads....ahhh! And she's only 23 (I think?) My heart is singing very happy tunes today. 



What I'm Reading:
I have a {big} birthday coming up and Ryan surprised me with an early present! I've had my eye on the Crossway Single Column Bible for a while now. There is space on the sides for writing down notes and interacting with the Word. I carry it wherever I go. I crave time with my Bible now. 


photo courtesy of IG @soulscripts

Instagram friends:
My bff told me about #shereadstruth. It's an amazing concept. The SRT team has an app and an online (or print) daily devotion. Then you connect with an online community. They combine the devotion with beautiful photography + scripture overlays to help you memorize verses.

I'm currently tuned into the book of Daniel but my mom and sister are going to join me once the letters from Paul study begins in September. 

My Church:
We have been attending TPCC now just under four years. A series of events led us here. And I know now, this is where God wants us to be right now. Our souls are being fed. There is an incredible community of brothers and sisters. The pastors have been hitting the sermons out of the park. There is love and there is accountability. This is a sermon from a couple weeks ago on grace and truth. So good. Traders Point live streams every Sunday at 9 and 11. Then on Mondays, sermons are posted for you to listen or watch at your convenience. So even when we're gone, we rarely miss our Sunday meal.  



I'm so thankful for these influences God has put in my life. There are so many more. But I have been rambling to all my friends and family lately about what is inspiring me.  So here it is. Links of love and all. 
Have a great weekend!

Her Baby's Baby

My parents have been on a trip to NYC since Saturday morning. I love that city so much. I am thankful they were able to escape for a few days together. I volunteered to watch their house and their pup while they were gone.

It has been nice sleeping in my old room. But its a little different than when I was in high school. These passed 4 nights, I have shared my full bed with my husband, two dogs and at various times in the night, a baby. Needless to say, it was "cozy". I know Ryan will appreciate getting back to our own bed soon.

I assumed that work would slow down this week since it was the week of Thanksgiving. Fortunately, it has not. (I truly am thankful for it.) I have more active buyers and sellers right now than I have ever had at one time. In the meantime, I am still trying to take care of things for two households. I am not looking for a pity party- but sometimes a girl hits a wall. So I am SO thankful to Diane, Missy, Ryan, Bev, and others who have helped me juggle working and being a mom while my primary babysitter has been gone.

I have always been so appreciative of my mom. (Even more so than ever this week.) Not only what she does for me, but how she extends that motherly loving grace to those I love as well. My husband, family and my friends have all seen the nurturing spirit of this wonderful woman.

However, the love she has shown my son since before she even met him has floored me. I can't even comprehend my own love for him, so how can I begin to comprehend her love for him? She would do anything for my baby. She volunteers (YES-VOLUNTEERS) to watch him for me while I work with my crazy, inconsistent schedule. And she does it with a happy heart.

I know I am so fortunate to have my mom watch my baby so I can work. It eases my stress to know he is with her.

So thank you, Mom, for loving your baby's baby.

Loving Briggsy before his arrival
This is love.
Sweet chubby baby.
He has no choice but to be a Sox fan.
Love for her froggy.



Precious Moments

One of our friends who met Briggs in person for the first time this weekend mentioned to me that he looks like a "Precious Moments" baby with his big eyes. I thought that was such a cool thing for her to say. No one had ever made that comparison before. Now looking through his pictures, it really is true.

It's ironic because as a young girl I used to collect the little figurines. They meant so much to me because my mom would help me carefully pick one out- one in which spoke to my heart. If you aren't familiar with them, they are a Christian company. Each product has a scripture written on it. Each Precious Moment has a purpose, a message to portray that glorifies God and the love he has for His people.

A warm sense of love wrapped around me when I thought about what this could mean. My Briggsy belongs to the Lord. I am blessed enough to be his mom but ultimately he is His. He is God's "Precious Moment" baby. God knows his purpose. I pray God will use Briggs to help spread His love. What more could a mother ask for?

I give all my praise to The Lord for giving me the opportunity to have such a special part in raising God's Precious baby for His Purpose.

Florida Blessings

Our whole family just got back today from our other home in Siesta Key. (Whole family including mom, dad, Kara, Ryan M, Phippsy, my Ryan and Briggs and I.) I am telling you, October is hands down the best time to go to Florida- especially with a baby. Unlike our May trip with a 4 month old, we found Florida's October weather to be much more tolerable and much less crowded. Plus having a 9 month old was fun because he was so much more aware. (Um yes he turned 9 months while we were there- I don't know if I have come to terms with that yet.)

I think just on the first day I was able to spend more time outside on the beach than I did collectively the whole time we were there in May. It helped a lot that Briggs was able to take his naps on the beach (thanks for that baby). This Florida trip created so many good memories with my wonderful family:

(I know some of these are minor, but when you have a little one, you tend to enjoy the little things that you didn't realize before.)
  • Beach Days with Briggs
  • Sitting by the dock and watching the boats go by
  • Bocce and other various sports
  • Reading by the pool
  • Enjoying dinners with a baby who was distracted by his sweet potato puffs
  • Family cookout on the beach
  • Boat day on the inter coastal
  • A Buccaneers game and meeting up with Tay
  • Sunset at the marina
  • Daily morning walks on the beach with my two boys
I'm happy to be home but I'm always so appreciative to have little breaks from the daily grind. It's nice to stop and just enjoy the blessings-

Broad Ripple Birthday

Yesterday was my 27th birthday. And I got exactly what I wanted....a day with my family. Ryan and I took the day off and went on a day trip to Broad Ripple. We walked the Monon, drank a beer at Broad Ripple Brew Pub and spent the afternoon at the park with our baby.

It's funny how much life can change in just a few short years. For my 24th birthday I went to Broad Ripple as well. However, it was at a very different time and for very different reasons. While I loved the "party" phase in my young twenties, I am much more content today. I have an inner peace and constant joy that I couldn't claim then. 

I realize that with every birthday will come a higher number in age and while sometimes that seems a little scary, yesterday showed me that it's okay that we are all growing up. It's a part of life. And I am living mine to the fullest with those I love most.


16 Weeks Photos

At 16 Weeks, our little guys is getting such a personality! It brightens my day every morning when I wake up and see his smiling face. He is laughing so hard, he screams. He is so dramatic...I don't know where he gets that from. :)

Thursday, our good friend Ally Dant came to take his 3 month pictures. He is 16 weeks but won't officially turn 4 months until May 20. We are IN LOVE with these pictures. Briggs was fascinated by the clicking of the camera...he was quite the poser. I'm so thankful we were able to capture such precious memories. We will treasure these always! I hope you enjoy!


Click the link below if you cannot see the 16 week slideshow
BBR 16 Weeks


One of Us

If you know anything about my taste in music, you know that I am a huge fan of the singer/songwriter genre. Dave Barnes fits into this category and is probably one of my favorites of all time. In fact, we are going to see him in concert this Saturday (my first night out since baby). His music has served as therapy to my heart and soul over the years and he continues to do so with his newest album, "Stories to Tell."

As Briggs and I were taking a walk, I was listening to his new album that came out yesterday. Then Dave's song, "One of Us" started to play. I immediately began crying as soon as I heard the first few lines. While staring at my baby and listening to this love-letter-of-a-song, I couldn't help to just stand in awe of God's grace. Welcome to being "one of us," my baby boy.


Another blessing is that I was able to catch multiple smiles of our boy today! Here is the progression of smirks to a giant baby grin! I'm SO in love with this boy:



His Birth Story

24 hours exactly before meeting my baby
1.5 week-old Briggs and mommy
I feel as though Briggs's birth story starts out a little earlier than when I thought it would have (although I didn't know it at the time.)  As I mentioned in the 37 week post, I had been having contractions frequently and was dilated to 1 cm at that week's appointment. Leading up to my 38 week appointment on a Friday, the story was still the same. I was so convinced that at that appointment I was going to be dilated to at least 3 cm because I was so uncomfortable and had been having contractions all week long. Well, sure enough my OB was delivering a baby that morning so I was checked by the Physician's Assistant. Unfortunately, I had not progressed at all! I might have been a little more effaced, but that was it. Needless to say, my spirits were pretty down. It wasn't because I wasn't going into labor yet, it was because I was feeling so much activity but nothing was happening. I was beginning to worry I was going to go way passed due being a first time mom. I really did not want to be induced either.

That next Monday the 16th, was Ryan's birthday. Our families all met at Bazbeaux's for his birthday celebration. The whole night, I was miserable. I definitely felt the contractions about 5 minutes a part for at least one minute. However, it was more uncomfortable than painful, so I just figured it was more of those pesky Braxton Hicks that I had been dealing with for the last two weeks. That night, we had cake and ice cream. We took the following picture because my parents have a picture just like this one 2 days before I was born on my dad's 27th birthday. Guess what birthday this was for Ryan?


My contractions continued throughout the next day. So on Tuesday, I finally convinced myself maybe this really is something. So I called the doctor. They had me come in. I was checked. I was now "a little" over 1 cm. I cried. (How do OB's deal with all these hormonal women, by the way?) She gave me some meds to relax my body. She said my body was kind of in spaz mode. They hooked me up for a non-stress test just to make sure the baby was ok. He was perfect. However, they did detect my contractions. They thought the new meds would help my body relax and help me sleep so if I really was in early labor, perhaps my body could be a little more productive. They did help me sleep. However, at that point I was mentally preparing myself to not be able to meet my baby until around 41 weeks.

Wednesday was a pretty non-active day as far as contractions. I was physically feeling better but still pretty down in the dumps. Then on Thursday my mom and sister were sick of me moping around so they took me to Broad Ripple so we could walk around and shop at some of the local baby and bridal boutiques. It was so nice to get out of the house despite being the size of a jumbo jet. I felt really good for the first time in a month. When Ryan came home that night, I had convinced myself that I was going to just relax and enjoy the rest of the time of just being us two. So we had a quiet night. We even tried starting a puzzle. I suck at puzzles. So Ryan worked on the puzzle and I drank pineapple juice- I think I had read somewhere that it helps induce labor. So it was a crazy night at the Robinson household- fo sho. I had fallen asleep on the couch and I barely remember Ryan helping me to bed.

Then at about 1:00am Friday morning at 39.2 weeks pregnant, I woke up from the contractions again. Ryan was still awake. I was joking around saying this was it. But I really thought my body was just playing tricks on me again. These contractions were different though. They completely wrapped around my back and I definitely couldn't talk through them. However, I was so hesitant to call the doctor on-call because I didn't want to wake her in the middle of the night and I didn't want to drive 35 minutes to the hospital, only to be disappointed again. However, the contractions intensified. I continued to labor at home for about 2 hours. I finally convinced myself to call the doctor when I felt something move...like the baby's head. The doctor sent us up to the hospital. The contractions continued all the way up to Carmel. Ryan was awesome. He helped coach me through each one despite the fact that he was driving. When we got there, a nurse greeted us at labor and delivery. She said, "So you think this is the real thing?" and I said, "I hope so...otherwise this really sucks." So I get all gowned up, she checks me, and...........I was dilated to 4 almost 5! The nurse told us we were there to stay. Hallelujah!! I then smiled at Ryan and said "We get to meet our baby today!"

Things moved pretty quickly after that. They sent me to a labor and delivery room. Gave me my IV's and the glorious epidural. I didn't even feel it because I was having a contraction through the sticking. I was a little worried that the epi would slow down my progress, but it definitely did not. The only scary thing that happened, was that at one point it had lowered my blood pressure so much that I felt as though I was either going throw up or pass out or both. The baby was distressed from the drop as well. The whole medical crew came in and helped me through it both emotionally and physically. After that we kept a very close eye on both my BP and the baby's heart rate and both were at a healthy place for the remainder of labor.

At 7:00am, the doctor on call (Dr. Raney) came in to check me and break my water. I was now at 7cm on my own and 100% effaced. She broke my water and then headed back to the office in Zionsville. My nurse then asked if I would mind if two Purdue student nurses could sit in during my delivery. I told her I didn't mind as long as they weren't my former students-ha. So I met the student nurses...and despite being form Purdue, were precious and ended up being my saving grace.

At around 10:00 am, I was feeling a TON of pressure. I didn't have the strongest epi as it was at my request, but the pressure definitely was getting way intense. My nurse and the student nurses came in and I asked her when I was going to get checked again. She said Dr. Raney told her not to check me again until 11:00am because I was a first time mom. I told her she should check me soon because I was feeling so much pressure AND every woman in my family has had super fast deliveries. She told me that was good to know, but didn't want to check me too much. The student nurses looked concerned as they left the room. At around 10:30, the nurse and the student nurses came back in. The student nurse had convinced her to come in and check me...thank goodness she did! I was dilated to 10cm and the baby was at a +2 station. I was ready to push-and my doctor was at the office in Zionsville. The nurse calls my doctor then (Dr. Johnson) and she leaves the office and rushes over the hospital. It took her way longer than usual because roads were blocked off. So I had to wait until 11:00 until she got there to start pushing. I was so ready to push and felt helpless because I had to wait.

As soon as she got to the room at 11:00, I began to push right away. Ryan was on my right, coaching me through the whole thing. He was awesome...but I think the doctor was getting frustrated when he would let go of my foot to go cool himself down between contractions-ha. My mom and sister were behind my head recording the whole thing on video and taking pictures. I really wanted to have his first breath recorded.  I remember the doctor and the nurse kind of giving each other a look after pushing through the 3rd contraction. In my head, I was kind of freaking out thinking the baby's head was stuck and I went through all this only to have an emergency C-section. So I put myself in a very determined and focused mental zone. I had the eye of the tiger and was not about to give up. So I pushed through about two more contractions and then-on the first push of my final contraction, he literally flew out like a jet. It scared me so much I screamed! I was not expecting him to fly out so fast that the doctor literally had to catch him.

So then we met. He was such a "perfect pink" the nurse told me that they let him stay on my chest for about a half hour without even taking him away to measure him or take his vitals. It was the most spiritual and breathtaking moment I have ever experienced in my life. My son had arrived. He was beautiful and healthy...my prayers had been answered. At that moment I had finally understood the magnitude of God's love for me. Praise God for our miracle!!


The first text I read once in postpartum, was from John Noel, the preacher who married us but who is also one of our best friends in the entire world. His text was a simple prayer for Briggs. I can't think of a more appropriate way to wrap up this post and start a new life with these words:


Indomitable Glee

33 weeks and 6 days Check-In:

I am sitting here at the office trying to be as proactive as possible before I take time off to have this little guy. Business is starting to pick up and a baby is on the way. In my current state, any woman who is trying to carry on with her pre-pregnancy daily grind is in all honesty, a superwoman. My mind and my drive are the same but my body puts up an epic battle every time I try to go back to my old Tasmanian Devil-like tornado ways. 

My Current Symptoms:
  • Fatigue...all the time. However, I have a hard time sleeping. This makes so much sense.
  • Brain Cloud- I've never been the sharpest tool in the shed but seriously, thanks to those wonderful pregnancy hormones, my brain is in a constant fog. I think I will shock the office when I come back to work without being pregnant. They will realize how much of a non-airhead I truly am.
  • Hip Pain-It get's worst by the day too. Sometimes at night I think I truly cannot take another step because my joints are so loose and painful that my hips are going to break like I'm a 95-year-old woman.
  • Leg Cramps-At least once a week, I wake up crying from the most painful Charlie Horse...poor Ryan probably thinks I'm having labor pains.
  • Indomitable Glee- You could wrap all of these negative side-effects into one and multiply it and I would still have a wonderful day. It's something more than just being happy. It's pure joy. Even if I am not talking about the baby, he is on my mind. My heart is in a constant state of a beaming smile. I see the world so much more optimistically. Every time the baby kicks me in the rib, it may be uncomfortable (he is VERY strong at this point), but I just look at it as God telling me he loves me. Ha. So cheesy, I know but isn't that what motherhood is all about? I feel as though I am truly a soldier of the Lord carrying on part of His higher purpose. It is the most magical feeling in the world. Carrying your child is truly a gift from the Lord. 
To wrap it up, I was watching the Preacher's Wife the other night. This is one of my all-time favorite movies with one of my all-time favorite women, my Whitney. (Whitney Houston- who I named my childhood puppy after.) I am a hormonal mess as it is, but it got me thinking of this song which took me over the edge. If I could put a message in a bottle for my little one to read right now it would say this: 



The Heart of the Matter

The 8-week appointment was big. I had scheduled it with my OBGYN for June 10.  This was the first day they would see me. I was so excited to see my "girl doctor" for a reason other than my yearly exam. I have been seeing the same doctor since I was in high school, and in my fantasy world, I believe that we are BFF's. I expected them to be just as excited as I was. I thought they would want to confirm the pregnancy with a blood test at least! But of course the receptionists brought me back to reality.

June 10 seemed to never arrive. When it finally did, Ryan met me in Zionsville at the doctor's office. He took pictures of me in the waiting room. I got kind of embarrassed because he kept calling out the fact that I was the only one in the waiting room that wasn't at least 36+ weeks pregnant. He was singing "which one is not like the other ones..." in the most melodic of Ryan tunes (or lack there of).

We finally get called back. The routine begins. Check weight. (Ugh. It's hard adjusting to the mindset that its OK to see the numbers go up after counting every calorie that went into my body for the last year.) Next, pee in a cup. Check blood pressure. And now finally..........the ultra sound.

Ryan and I were so excited/anxious for this moment. At this point, my only signs of pregnancy were bloating and more bloating. I didn't feel pregnant. Was there really a little being inside of me? Is the baby healthy? Will we be able to hear that magical sound of its heartbeat? The tech quickly put our worries to rest. The first thing she checked was the baby's heartbeat. 172. A healthy 8-week heartbeat. The sound was the most beautiful music I have ever heard. There is something so moving about hearing your child's heartbeat for the first time. It is a moment I will never forget. You may be able to see/hear it if you listen closely to the video.


We also got some great pictures of Baby Robinson.



We were overwhelmed with joy. This is our family. I got to see my doctor shortly after that and then my amazing nurse, Stephanie. With a packet full of information including everything from what to eat and what not to eat while pregnant, to the information on IU North Hospital, our delivery site, we were on our way out the door.

We were joyful and cautiously excited at the same time. We ended up celebrating at the most romantic of places...Subway. While eating our lunch we couldn't stop staring at the video and pictures of our Little One. We probably won't stop until we finally get to meet him or her in January.

Life's a Journey

When I first saw the second pink line on the beautiful spring morning on May 19, I was overcome with joy. (This is a story in itself that I will have to post later.) This is exactly what Ryan and I had been hoping for...dreaming for, since the day we decided we wanted to be together forever. It was never a question of "if" we are going to have kids, but "when?"

Being a high school teacher, I thought it would be best if we timed it so that the baby would come during the second semester of school. Well it was a success. Our due date would be January 25, 2012. That is when our miracle is to join a loving mother, father, and even an anxious little jack russell. (yes, i'm convinced she's completely aware and excited as well.)

We wanted to wait to tell the family until Father's Day, which would be exactly one month from the day we found out we were pregnant. I would be 8 weeks by then, with an ultrasound and doctor's visit under our belt, we would have peace of mind that we were progressing with a healthy pregnancy. This was our plan.

However, God works in mysterious ways. On Tuesday May 24, just four days after we got the Big Fat Positive, I found out that God had a much different plan than we did. Due to budget cuts in the Avon School Systems, I was told that I was being RIF'd. I was completely caught off guard. My first thought was the baby. Is the baby going to be ok after getting this bomb dropped on me? How am I going to keep my stress levels down? How am I going to have health coverage throughout my entire pregnancy. Oh, ye who have little faith. Little did I know during my shock and panic, that God had a much bigger plan for the Robinson family.

Believe it or not, this was Tuesday's daily Bible verse that I had taken a picture of that very morning to send to Ryan before I got the news. It still brings tears to my eyes when I read it because He was already showing me that He had it under control.



I called my family immediately after talking to Ryan and telling him about that terrible meeting with the two superintendents and my principal (who held me in his arms and cried with me- talk about compassion). With Ryan's blessing, I met my family (Mom, Dad, Kara and Ryan Matthews) in Florida that very day. Dad flew me down because he knew I was in such a state of distress that I couldn't stay in Avon. I arrived at the Sarasota airport at 5:30 p.m. Dad and Ryan M. picked me up from the airport because I was now going to be an intricate part in what would be one of my baby sister's milestone life moments. Ryan M. was going to PROPOSE to my Kara that night. And I was going to witness it. Wow. My heart couldn't handle that much emotion and my head couldn't comprehend it. But I am so thankful that I was given the opportunity to be there...and even more, I was the only one who documented it through video! It was so incredibly special to see my sister so happy. It was so apparent even through the hazy darkness I felt that day. Nothing can overshadow my joy for her. May 24 will forever be HER day. That is how it will be remembered.



Ryan proposed to Kara at sunset on our beach in front of Palm Bay Club. After she of course said yes, we went out to one of our favorite restaurants, Roy's. Ryan and I had decided before he dropped me off at the airport that when I got down to Florida, I was going to tell the family our good news, so that I could have more emotional support and understanding during such a confusing time.

So there at Roy's, I put Ryan on speaker phone and announced our great news to the family. The first person to say anything was Ryan M. He yelled out, "I'm going to be an Uncle!" I loved it. The more surprising reaction of the bunch was my dad's. His jaw dropped and was speechless for at least a minute. I'm pretty sure I've never seen my dad speechless about anything. I knew it was a good speechless because since the day Ryan and I said "I do" he has wanted us to try and give him a grandbaby. He was just so overcome with emotion from the day. He later told me he was so thankful to have good news for me too. Mom actually already knew, so she was relieved and joyful and Kara was beaming!

So the day was a blessing in the end. It was only the beginning of the road to recovery after being laid off from my job. I tried to keep it in perspective by remembering that it was only a job and my family and my baby were forever. But I also kept thinking that I will miss my friends. I will miss my kids. And I will miss my ability to constantly be involved and grow in the world of academia. (I truly am a nerd at heart.) However, this is not the end for my passion in Geography. I will continue to learn and discover more of this love in many more avenues. But on this day, I was still hurting. It won't be forever but I needed to heal. The best way for me to do that? I signed up for Real Estate licensing classes the next day. Thanks to the blessing of my dad welcoming me with open arms on his team, I could say, F.C. Tucker....here I come. The Robinsons have arrived. The horizon is very bright.